Unmasked: Women, Leadership & the Inner Voice - Episode 2 with Lisa Allden

Gemma Hogan_Talenta Ltd
Oct 10
8 min read

A conversation series, with featured guests, about overcoming imposter syndrome.

This blog explores the impact of our internal dialogue when it’s working against us. From self-doubt and sabotage to playing small and minimising ourselves. Whether you're a leader or aspiring to be one, this piece offers insight into a common inner struggle and some strategies for managing it.

Introduction: Why We’re Talking About Imposter Syndrome

Imposter syndrome affects up to 70% of people at some point in their careers.

For women in leadership, the impact can be particularly intense. Research shows that 75% of executive women have experienced imposter syndrome, and many still grapple with self-doubt even after achieving senior roles.

In the second of a regular feature series, I am really excited that Lisa Allden agreed to share her experiences and insights. I met Lisa previously when we undertook our Post-graduate Certificate in Professional Coaching at Leicester Castle Business School circa. 8 years ago, and I’ve had the pleasure of working on coaching projects with her over the last few years. We now work in partnership to facilitate our Elevate Her - a Women in Leadership Programme for aspiring and newly appointed female leaders.

Understanding Imposter Syndrome & your Inner Critic

Imposter syndrome is the persistent feeling of being a fraud despite evident success which affects countless professionals, but it can be especially pervasive among women in leadership.

It is subtle yet impacts in ways that influence confidence, decision-making, communication, and career progression.

The Inner critic refers to your inner voice that judges, criticises, or demeans you whether or not the self-criticism is objectively justified. Research shows that children who grow up with very critical parents tend to internalise those voices and grow up to be very self-critical themselves. Becoming aware of your inner critic, reframing, and practising kindness can help to reduce its negative impact.

💭 Have you ever let your internal dialogue and the comments of others lead to self-sabotage? You’re not alone.

Feature Interview: Lisa Allden on Self-sabotage and the Inner Critic Battle

Lisa is a Career Coach, Sales Manager, and Senior Leader with 20+ years’ experience helping companies and individuals thrive across diverse sectors. As a strategic leader, she transforms people and organisations through impactful projects, strategies, change, and leadership development. As a coach, she specialises in guiding senior teams and individuals through complex transformations, building their capability and confidence along the way.

For me Lisa encompasses qualities that I admire - she’s full of wisdom, an excellent coach and upholds strong values and ethical practice. The word impact comes to mind - anyone who has worked with or been coached by Lisa can’t speak highly enough of her or the effect she’s had on them and that’s why I invited her to share her story.

Can you recall a time when you felt like you didn’t belong, even though you were fully qualified?

Every role I’ve been in. Initially, I know I should be there as I got the job and passed the tests. But when I’m in the job, I tell myself “This is a fluke, how did I get here? They’re paying me this money; it’s almost like theft.”

How did self-doubt and/or imposter syndrome first show up for you in your leadership journey?

When I went into a role and the people I was managing, the team, would say things like “why should I teach you to do this stuff that needs to be done. You’re being paid more than me. You’re in a strategic role; you should know this stuff and the context of what we do.” I asked myself “what am I doing here?” Then, I aligned myself with the most junior staff and dumbed down my skill set. I focused on building relationships at that level first and then with more senior staff. It felt like there was no trust or respect. Every decision, brought down by the weight of regulatory bodies, cast self-doubt and aspersions on it. One senior strategic board member constructively dismissed me, but I didn’t realise it at the time. They took half my job away from me. I thought “they don’t have faith in me now” but in reality, they didn’t understand what I had been doing. In another role, I previously had double the work but remained on the same pay and I thought “I’m stealing money from you here”.

What were some messages (internal or external) that fuelled your self-doubt? “I’m not training you; you need to find out. You’re earning more than me; it’s not right for me to train you.” It was a different role, but I didn’t recognise it. I felt shame - I got the job, I’m leading them, and they’ve pointed out the truth “you don’t know stuff.” I heard “you’re not good enough to be in this job” but that didn’t matter - I could learn the knowledge, but I didn’t recognise it at the time. I didn’t feel like I had time to present myself properly, I just thought “you don’t deserve to be here” instead of having self-care and belief in myself. I was showing what people were telling me I was instead of my own perception.
What turning points helped you begin to shift your mindset?

When I began interviewing others and realising that processes and policies you can learn, knowledge you can gain but I was recruiting for attitude and soft skills. When I was on a work trip, during a chat with a colleague they said to me ‘look at where you are today given your social economic background’. I remember a peer chatting with me and saying, ‘you’ve done that witchcraft thing on me again’ and I said, “I don’t know what you mean”. They said, ‘you’ve slipped into it without knowing it.’ Others were telling me ‘You’re so good at coaching’ so I started a coaching side hustle. It was validation, although I didn’t think I needed it.

Were there mentors, books, or tools that made a difference?

Interestingly, mainly male influences who have been mentors. In terms of thought provoking - the first coaching programme I attended as a week’s residential, I had a complete mindset shift in managing people. It totally shifted my learned behaviours.

6. How do you handle moments of self-doubt now - what's changed?

It still slips in, but I know I’m good at what I do, and I was good at the job I have just left. When I think about the leadership shadow cast by other leaders, I managed brilliantly and got the work done. I’m good enough, validated by the programmes I’ve delivered. Working with likeminded people, I feel inspired and motivated.

How do you think self-doubt and/or imposter syndrome uniquely impacts women in leadership?

We’re in a space where we’re daughters, wives, sisters, carers (up & down the chain) with expectations and responsibilities of being an equal partner. Whereas the cave man mentality is to go out, get the meat and put it on the table. As women, we say “I’ll do this and bear and look after children, parents, nurture friendship groups and develop myself; superwoman - I can do everything.” But then we fall over and have an outburst. If we strip back on a day-to-day basis of male and female roles - career, house, caring responsibilities, communities, etc. women put in more effort. The imposter syndrome dialogue is “if I don’t do X, I’m worthless. If I don’t make an effort, I’m not good enough.” Is our internal dialogue a result of too much emotional intelligence? Emotionally - what’s going on and needing to be in control. As a woman, being a multi-faceted human being constantly - we can have it all and why shouldn’t we?

8. What advice would you give to a younger version of yourself or someone experiencing self-doubt right now?

Acknowledge that it is there but call it out – tell the voice of self-doubt that you are going to continue to do the thing you are employed to do, and at the end of it, see if the voice is still there.

9. How do you support others in your team or network who may struggle with self-doubt and/or imposter feelings?

I ask them to talk me through/show me the evidence of when they have been successful and achieved the thing that they are now struggling with. I also ask them for evidence of being ‘called out’ as a fraud/imposter. I have yet to meet anyone who has evidence of this. Evidence is such a powerful tool.

10. What role does workplace culture play in reinforcing or easing self-doubt?

For me, it is huge. I thrive in a workplace where my values align with those of the workplace. If my values start to rub, and my moral compass starts to spin, this has an impact on my mental health.

11. What do confident, inclusive environments look like to you?

Environments where people are encouraged to be agile, to develop, and to be recognised for doing a good job, remembering that sometimes good is good enough. Where you are encouraged to grow and to thrive and not be afraid to make decisions or challenge.

12. What would you love to see change in how we talk about confidence, competence, and leadership?

To recognise that confidence can be perceived as arrogance. To talk about these things in the positive, and not the negative. For women in particular confidence can be called many different things, and not all positive.

My advice for women with an overbearing Inner Critic:

Be true to your self
Be true to your values
If it feels wrong, it probably is
Don’t be scared to challenge

3 Top Strategies to tame your Inner Critic

Confidence isn’t a prerequisite - it’s a byproduct of action. So, when you hear your negative and unhelpful internal dialogue, try these strategies:

✅ Strategy 1 - Getting to know your Inner Critic

1️⃣ Identify your inner critic - what is it trying to tell you? Remember it’s not reality but an earlier unhelpful viewpoint that you have adopted.

2️⃣ Separate from your inner critic - view the thoughts away from yourself. For example, write them down in the second person ‘you’ll never be successful’.

3️⃣ Respond to your inner critic - write down a more compassionate and realistic view of yourself (reframe).

4️⃣ Don’t act on your inner critic - act in a way that reflects who you want to be and how you want to act.

✅ Strategy 2 - Reframing negative, unhelpful thoughts

Change “I’m not ready yet” to “I’m learning as I go and that’s enough.”
Change “I’ll speak up once it’s perfect” to “progress matters more than perfection.”
Change “They probably know more” to “I bring a perspective no one else has.”
Change “I’ll wait until I feel confident” to “confidence grows when I show up anyway.”

✅ Strategy 3 - Practising (self) kindness & compassion

Ask yourself “what assumptions am I making here? What’s the actual reality?” Focus on the positives - collate evidence and review it as a positive reminder of progress.
Ask yourself “what would I say to a friend who doubts herself the way I do?” Apply the same kindness and compassion to yourself as you would to a friend.

Every time you challenge self-doubt, you build the muscle of self-belief.

Imposter syndrome isn’t a sign of incompetence; it’s often a side effect of competence navigating high expectations. Recognising its patterns is the first step toward shifting your mindset and building more confidence.

💭 What’s one unhelpful thought you’ve reframed recently?

Final Reflections from Our Guest

“You belong in the room - use your voice.”

How true is that? Yet, often as women we apologise for taking up space, other people’s time, not asking for a rightful seat at the table.

Let’s normalise the messy, brave process of growing into our confidence together.

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