Unmasked: Women, Leadership & the Inner Voice - Episode 3 with Kaye Meadows

Gemma Hogan_Talenta Ltd
5 days ago
10 min read

A conversation series, with featured guests, about overcoming imposter syndrome.

This blog explores what imposter syndrome is, how it shows up in the workplace, and why high-achieving women often feel they don’t belong at the table. From perfectionism and self-doubt to the weight of societal expectations and cultural conditioning, over the blog series we unpack the hidden forces that shape confidence. Whether you're a leader or aspiring to be one, this piece offers insight into a common inner struggle and how to start challenging it.

Introduction: Why We’re Talking About Imposter Syndrome

Imposter syndrome affects up to 70% of people at some point in their careers.

For women in leadership, the impact can be particularly intense. Research shows that 75% of executive women have experienced imposter syndrome, and many still grapple with self-doubt even after achieving senior roles.

In the third of a series of monthly features, I am really excited that Kaye Meadows agreed to share her experiences and insights. I met Kaye previously in her capacity as a Learning & Development (L&D) Practitioner at Office Depot about 10 years ago. As well as being a new founder, she was recently awarded British Skydiving’s New Skydiver of the Year 2025. For me Kaye encompasses qualities that I admire – she’s straight talking and hugely passionate about her craft. The word determined comes to mind – and that’s why I invited her to share her story.

💭 Have you ever doubted your own success, even when you’ve worked hard for it? You’re not alone.

Understanding Imposter Syndrome & Self-Doubt

Imposter syndrome is the persistent feeling of being a fraud despite evident success which affects countless professionals, but it can be especially pervasive among women in leadership.

It is subtle yet impacts in ways that influence confidence, decision-making, communication, and career progression. Here’s a breakdown of how it shows up, particularly for leaders:

Overworking or over-preparing – you may feel they need to ‘prove you belong’ by constantly going above and beyond, leading to burnout. You may overprepare for meetings, avoid delegation, or spend excessive time perfecting presentations.
Self-doubt despite evidence of success - even after promotions, achievements, or praise, you may dismiss your accomplishments as luck, timing, or external help, not internal ability.
Fear of being found out - a persistent fear of being ‘exposed’ as less competent than others perceive. This can cause anxiety before high-stakes meetings, presentations, or decision-making moments.
Avoiding visibility or opportunities - you may turn down speaking engagements, stretch projects, or promotions out of fear you’re not ready or “good enough.”
Difficulty internalising praise - compliments are brushed off or attributed to the team or circumstances rather than personal effort or talent.
Micromanaging or control issues - fear of failure can lead to controlling behaviour, with a reluctance to trust others to meet high (often perfectionistic) standards.
Underestimating impact or influence - even when in high-impact roles, you might downplay your contributions or hesitate to assert authority or share bold ideas.

Why It’s Especially Common Among Women in Leadership

Cultural conditioning - many women are socialised to be modest, self-critical, and deferential - traits that can clash with leadership expectations.
Underrepresentation - being ‘the only’ woman (or one of few) in the room can heighten scrutiny and pressure to perform, increasing self-doubt, even more so if you are the only person of colour.
Double standards - women are often judged more harshly and held to higher standards, whereas confident men are seen as competent; confident women may be labelled as aggressive or unlikable.
Perfectionism pressure - internal and external expectations push many women to believe they must be perfect to be accepted or respected in leadership.

💭 What internal narratives might be limiting your sense of confidence or capability?

Feature Interview: Kaye Meadows on Learning to Silence the Inner Critic

Kaye is a Management Development specialist and Insights Discovery Practitioner, and the founder of Sparked Potential. She works with organisations to strengthen manager capability - because poor management doesn’t just impact performance, it impacts people. Her work is driven by real experience, both supporting organisations and being on the receiving end of ineffective management, which shapes her purpose of building practical, human-centred management capability that actually translates into day-to-day behaviour.

Alongside her work, Kaye is also a keynote speaker, sharing her story of stepping outside her comfort zone - including taking up skydiving and being awarded British Skydiving’s New Skydiver of the Year 2025. Alas, I couldn’t include the full version here.

Can you recall a time when you felt like you didn’t belong, even though you were fully qualified?

Every new job. I think ‘they’re going to find me out’. In my last role - I secured the job which was a promotion and I was sat on the sofa with my mum, and I said ‘how am I earning this amount of money? How do they see me at this value?’ Growing up and in my entry-mid level career, I wouldn’t have thought I could get to this level. I told myself I was mediocre at best which I know is critical and a self-limiting belief. I always felt I wasn’t ready, people would see through me and not see the person I was at interview.

How did self-doubt and/or imposter syndrome first show up for you in your leadership journey?

My confidence was massively affected during my entry level L&D role - I was micromanaged and bullied; I was broken. I had no belief in my capability due to my manager. I ended up signed off with stress for 3 months and demoted when I returned to work. Previously I had believed in the company and that I was adding value. It was pure stress and the only way I could return was by demotion.

In my head I felt devalued and in front of my team my capability felt devalued - “you just couldn’t hack it”. I’d been in the role for 5 years under horrific management where I was drip fed negativity. The team perception was that I couldn’t hack it and it reinforced my own beliefs ‘I’m just crap’. I spent 2 years in a demoted role with promises of opportunities, but they never came up - lots of carrots. It took 2 years to go ‘I need to leave’.

What were some messages (internal or external) that fuelled your self-doubt? From my team, the business and family when I was demoted - “know your place, it’s evident you can’t do it. Stay where you are.” It took 2 years to put that to one side and accept that I wasn’t going to get any further in the business. I had to change the environment. I was given a programme to deliver with European exposure which helped me to reconnect. It was a reminder that ‘I can do this’. I didn’t need to “settle” or “accept”. I don’t think the manager’s behaviour was intentionally malicious, they just didn’t think things through, but those messages had a mental health impact. Despite being there for nearly 10 years and being 2 months away from my long-service award, I had to leave the environment - it was eating me alive - ‘you’re rubbish, you’re incapable’. I fell into L&D in 2002 - I had a passion, I was making a difference, adding value and growing capability. I used to jump out of bed! I absolutely love what I do. During this difficult period, I didn’t feel like getting out of bed, I felt miserable - it was really hard. But I’m a great believer in that life is what you make of it - you get out of it what you put into it. For things to change, I had to make it happen. I was a kid who went to a community college, who was lucky to get some GCSEs and ‘knowing my place’.
What turning points helped you begin to shift your mindset?

The first external role I was put into was a Leadership Development position with a trained and qualified psychologist as my manager - this increased my self-belief, even the interview process itself. Encouragement made me believe “you have something I want”. I felt reassured and that they’d seen something in me “she’s got something” - a vote of confidence. The family messaging also changed to “you can do it”.

It was a risk as I went from a permanent to a temporary position as a single parent, it was scary. My contract was extended after 12 months and when that ended, I secured my next role within a week.

My confidence grew in terms of what’s acceptable behaviour. I kicked a new hire out of induction training for discriminatory behaviour. I stood my ground in a male dominated environment and a very hostile situation. I was supported and felt empowered - ‘I’ve got this’. My purpose and self-belief showed up. They got reignited.

It was a springboard for the following 12-13 years of my career. Whereas, I could have stayed broken with negative beliefs, but I have something, I have capabilities that others don’t have. I want to prevent others from going through the same due to poor management skills. I want to ensure that managers have the right skillset to give employees the best possible chance. We need to stop promoting people due to technical abilities and develop people management skills. Managers make or break you.

Were there mentors, books, or tools that made a difference?

I’ve grown from every interaction. I’ve had some amazing mentors - line manager, skydiving instructor, training peer, the latter helped me to really grow my knowledge in management training.

Books - Six Thinking Hats (Edward de Bono), Quiet Leadership (David Rock) and

Good to Great (Jim Collins).

Insights Discovery massively developed my self-awareness in terms of who I am and how I interact with the world around me. It gave me permission and the confidence to be me.

6. How do you handle moments of self-doubt now - what's changed?

Building a business, I know I have the credibility, knowledge and skillset but I have new learning. Working in L&D for 20 years, I was getting comfortable and complacent. Being a beginner in skydiving has created a renewed appetite to learn. I’m not driven by the adrenalin of skydiving but by the learning.

None of us are ever the finished article. You can’t say ‘I’m done with learning now’. There are always new contexts, challenges, etc.

With my business I have so much self-doubt and overwhelm - ‘who I am to do this?’ But my why is bigger than my self-doubt - to upskill managers and protect employees.

When I completed my skydiving training which was instructor led, they jump with you and correct mistakes on the jump, I couldn’t complete my first solo (consolidated) jump - I froze, I was a mess without my safety net. I couldn’t get out of the plane and my brain said, ‘you can’t do it’. However, 2 hours later I did do it with the help of my community of instructors and coaches. They instilled 3 nuggets of gold that I needed to hear in that moment:

7. How do you think self-doubt and/or imposter syndrome uniquely impacts women in leadership?

Everyone feels it and has it going on to some extent. I’m yet to find a female in any position of authority that hasn’t got it - those moments of self-doubt, over-extending yourself, over-compensating all the time, having to prove yourself.

8. What advice would you give to a younger version of yourself or someone experiencing self-doubt right now?

Know your why. Your why must be bigger than your self-doubt. Your purpose is life is to help others, really utilise the skillset you’ve harnessed and honed, connect with humans.

9. How do you support others in your team or network who may struggle with self-doubt and/or imposter feelings?

I lead with sunshine yellow (Insights) and quite informal. I love to say hello to people and use positive language / superlatives. Some people don’t like it. I used to refer to someone as ‘super star Sally’ but she said she didn’t like it as it was too familiar and that I was her colleague, not her friend.

I think it’s important to give compliments - you don’t know what people have going on in their lives. Those micro moments can make a difference in someone’s day when they feel seen / heard. It can give them a bit of a boost, although as women we tend to downplay compliments.

10. What role does workplace culture play in reinforcing or easing self-doubt?

A massive part. Often comments aren’t challenged and left to slide. It depends on the culture - is inappropriate behaviour managed or encouraged? If you’re calling it out and challenging it but it’s so systemic that you can’t change it, you need to ask yourself, “is this the right environment for me to thrive?”Hurling stones at the person who went off sick for 3 months because they ‘couldn’t hack it’ and not holding the manager to account is an example of an organisation not being accountable.

11. What do confident, inclusive environments look like to you?

Listening with purpose - to understand and not to respond as Steven Covey says. It’s really important to be able to take on different perspectives so that everyone has a voice and opportunity to say, “I have a different idea / viewpoint”, “this is how I’m feeling”. Taking an interest in other human beings. We have the need to feel like we belong so connect and make the most of it.

12. What would you love to see change in how we talk about confidence, competence, and leadership?

Vulnerability - for everyone to feel safe to share, not to have things held against them or rocks thrown at them. Celebrate the little things - those micro moments. Being able to celebrate yourself and those around you.

But also challenging and changing the language around feedback. To motivational (keep up the great work) and developmental (let’s work together to improve) to keep the mindset in positive intent. To help them to develop and improve because no matter how you dress up criticism it damages self-belief.

My advice for women experiencing imposter syndrome/self doubt:

When self-doubt shows up, it makes you forget everything you’ve already done. Take a moment to look back at the evidence - the situations you’ve handled, the impact you’ve made, the challenges you’ve already overcome. That proof matters.
If you’re constantly questioning your worth, ask yourself whether it’s you - or the environment you’re in. The right environment will stretch you, not break you. Sometimes growth starts with having the courage to leave.
Confidence doesn’t come first — action does. You don’t need to have it all figured out. Do the thing anyway. Step through the fear. That’s where courage and belief is built.

A Top Strategy to Overcome Self-Doubt

The Confidence Evidence Bank - from the school of positive psychology, the objective is to anchor confidence in real experience by building an evidence-based journal.

Steps:

List 5 times you felt capable, proud, or courageous
Note what strengths you demonstrated (e.g., persistence, empathy, clarity)
Reflection: “What patterns do I notice about when I feel most confident?”
Create a 'Confidence Folder' (digital or notebook) and revisit weekly for positive reinforcement

Final Reflections from Our Guest

“Self-doubt doesn’t disappear - it just gets quieter when your purpose is louder. I’ve learned that I don’t need to feel ready to take the next step, I just need to be willing. The biggest shifts in my life and career have come from doing things before I felt fully capable - and realising, on the other side, that I was more ready than I thought.”

Let’s normalise the messy, brave process of growing into our confidence together.

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